Scarlett Johansson Photoshoot For Mango Clothing

Here's Scarlett Johansson trying to look sexy in some sort of 1980's retro photoshoot for Mango clothing. It's not working. My crotch and I have not been this bored since that time we went to a Melissa Etheridge concert. Do not get me wrong, it still worked, but I have not seen bush like that since my days playing shortstop for that women's softball team. Anyhow, that's not the point, the point is that these pictures are .... Pretty f @ # king boring.

Halle Berry A Little Kids Haircut,

Here's Halle Berry at the 6th annual benefit Keep a Child Alive last night. I've never been a big fan of little women with short haircuts, they should be left to chick softball players or women who have courageously beaten cancer, but Halle has always been able to pull it off. It's not sexy, it actually looks like a little kids first haircut, but Halle makes it work using an old magician's trick. She distracts us with her sweet boobs.

Alessandra Ambrosio Looking Hot In Tight Dress

Here's supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio looking hotter than ever in her tiny little somewhat see through dress at MTV Awards 2009 last night. I do not have any idea what the event is, but I'm glad we get a good look at Alessandra. I'm not great with languages, as you can probably tell by my writing, but I'm almost Certain that 'The Awards' loosely translated means 'the boobs'.

Padma Lakshmi Is Pregnant

Here's Top Chef beauty Padma Lakshmi at the 6th annual benefit Keep a Child Alive looking as stylish as ever. We do not normally see her wearing such revealing dresses but I like it. I'm trying my best to resist the temptation of making a childish joke titty, Because Padma is such a classy woman, but those boobs pregnant lady could keep a small third world country alive.

Shay Laren Picture Moment